It is 1am after Christmas and I am pooped.  I have been eating all day long and can now only effectuate movement by rolling myself over.  I managed to make it into bed but am concerned that I will suffocate overnight by my own newly-developed layer of lard.  I hope you all had as great a holiday as I did and that you survive the night.  Self-lard suffocation is a greater problem in America than you may imagine.

Finished my last final today.  Done with exams.  Exhausted.  Paper due in January.  Yuck.

Of course the “rumor” regarding the two 1Ls in the library is true.  Lots of people know who they were already, and if you want to know, just keep asking your friends.   Obviously, I won’t be posting actual names on this site.  I know, The People demand it of me.  I have always been dedicated to The People, but no one deserves to ruin a legal career over horniness during law finals. No harm, no foul.  Except for the fact that I can never walk into that room again (not that I ever used the room before…  not that I am ever in the library any more, for that matter).

Now I am trying to think of a better paper topic for Law Firms as Business Organizations.  Anyone have any ideas for me?

Now that I have reached the pinnacle of my e-procrastination career (being linked off of abovethelaw), I don’t know what to do with myself.  I mean yes, I could be studying Securities Regulation right now, but how can I possibly do that when I could be basking in my glory of success?

Sadly, I consider this no success.  This means that (1) I need to watch what I post on here (every firm I’ve ever worked for already knows about this blog) and (2) I will undoubtedly get yelled at soon for putting such things on my personal website.  Curses, ATL.  You’ve ruined my life (even more so than when you ruined it by merely existing in the first place and caused me to hit the refresh button incessantly waiting for “NYC to 190!” to show up).

But, in the event that my firm does find this (which I estimate to be within the next 3.78 minutes), I just want to clear up a few things:

1. I am studying hard.  I am being such a good student.  Also, I love classes and education and learning.
2. I was not a part of any such scandal.
3. Please don’t hate me; I am a good kid.
4. How bad does a C- look your 3L year?  I’m just saying.  This won’t happen to me, but um, I have some friends who are concerned.  Yep.

Alright, that was my 26 second study break.  Time to continue learning the wonders of the ‘33 and ‘34 Acts.  Again, man do I love learning.

It seems more fun than M&A right now, anyway.

From a tipster:

“Two 1L’s were busted bumping nasties in the cell phone booth, I think yesterday.”

Does anyone know anything about this?  I am going to need some details, please.

Virginia was selected for the January 1 Gator Bowl vs. Texas Tech in Jacksonville, FL.  Does anyone want to go down for that?  I can’t decide!  I sure want to.

So, I am outlining now (and I use that term very, very loosely). I am going off of Joey Katzen’s outline for M&A and I wasn’t sure if I knew this guy or not, so I facebooked him. He is a UVA LAW ‘07 alum, and when I saw his profile, he had a link to www.joeykatzen.com — where I found the most fascinating thing ever. He may be the next Will Shortz, but take some time while you’re procrastinating and check it out - loads of fun, and 4 editions!